Have you recently had a meaningful conversation? I mean something besides the weather, your kids, or the future of the Pac-12, but the kind of conversation, whether it is with your spouse, a friend, or a new acquaintance, where you walk away feeling engaged and understood?

In “10 Ways to Have a Better Conversation”, a TED Talk on YouTube, Celeste Headlee describes how to find the balance between talking and listening to have more meaningful and respectful conversations – which seems to be a lost skill nowadays.

As I read these suggestions, I realized I often ignore many of them if not most of them. You might also find that to be true.

Number one: Don’t multitask.

Be in the present. Don’t be thinking about where you’re going for dinner or the snow starting to fall outside.

Number two: Don’t pontificate.

Assume you have something to learn which often means setting aside your own opinions. Everybody is an expert in something.

Number three: Use open-ended questions.

Start your questions with who, what, when, where, why, or how. You’ll get more interesting responses if you let the person describe their thoughts, experiences, or feelings.

Number four: Go with the flow.

How often does a thought come to mind that you just have to say it even though it may not add to the conversation? Stories and ideas will come – but let them go.

Number five: If you don’t know, say you don’t know.

They won’t be surprised!

Number six: Don’t equate your experience with theirs.

If someone shares their dementia diagnosis don’t start saying how you have forgotten things too. It’s not the same; never will be. And it’s not about you anyway.

Number seven: Try not to repeat yourself.

Make your point but don’t keep rephrasing it over and over.

Number eight: Stay out of the weeds.

You don’t need to share all the details: years, names, dates, you’re struggling to remember. Most people don’t care. They want to learn more about what you think.

Number nine: Listen.

It’s not easy. Paying attention to someone takes effort and energy. As Stephen Covey, author and businessman, said “Most of us don’t listen with the intent to understand. We listen with the intent to reply.”

Number ten: Be brief.

As they say about a miniskirt, “Short enough to retain interest, but long enough to cover the subject.”

When talking with someone, there is nothing wrong with small talk. But if you want a more meaningful conversation where you learn about yourself, the other person, and the world around you, try these suggestions and you may be amazed by what you learn.

Brain Tease: A Rebus brain teaser uses words or letters in interesting orientations to represent common phrases. Can you decipher these musical instruments? 1. P O; 2. BA BA; 3. ECLART; 4. @ # $ %

The name of the novella that tells the story of a group of animals who rebel against their human farmer and end up in a state as bad as it was before, was Animal Farm. I received correct answers from Nancy Higgins, Jonnie Anderson, Steven Woolpert, Judy Kiser, Rhonda Spies, Tina Castanares, Lana Tepfer, Pat Evenson-Brady, Linda Frizzell, Donna Mollet, Dave Lutgens, and Randall Pearl this week’s winner of a quilt raffle ticket. And last week I missed Lee Kaseberg, Steven Woolpert, and Doug Nelson,

If you grew up in the 50s and 60s, Walt Disney was probably a big part of your childhood whether it was the animated movies or the Mickey Mouse Club – with my first “love” the popular Mouseketeer Annette Funicello. For this week’s “Remember When” question, in the movie “Pinocchio”, who was the wise and comical character that was appointed by the Blue Fairy to be Pinocchio’s official conscience? Email your answer to mcseniorcenter@gmail.com, call 541-296-4788, or mail it with a recording of the 1940 Academy Award-winning song “When You Wish Upon a Star”.

Well, it’s been another week, trying not to be ruled by the clock. Until we meet again, as a friend told me, “To keep it, you have to give it away.”

“All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.” — Charles M. Schulz

Nutritious home-delivered and in-person meals are available at noon Monday through Friday unless otherwise noted.

Seniors of Mosier Valley (541-980-1157) – Mondays and Wednesdays; Mt. Hood Townhall (541-308-5997) – Tuesdays; Hood River Valley Adult Center (541-386-2060); Sherman County Senior and Community Center (541-565-3191); The Dalles Meals-on-Wheels (541-298-8333).

For meal sites in Washington, call Klickitat County Senior Services: Goldendale office (509-773-3757) or the White Salmon office (509-493-3068), and in Skamania County call Senior Services (509-427-3990).

Answers:  1. Piano (P and O); 2. Tuba (Two BA); 3. Clarinet (CLAR in ET); 4. Cymbals (Symbols)

It’s Valentine’s Day! – a day to celebrate love and romance with a box of fine chocolates, a bouquet of roses, or maybe a candlelight dinner at home with a glass of wine.

My wife and I have celebrated Valentine’s Day as a married couple for over forty-nine years (Who would have thought!) and these later years have been the happiest years of our lives. Part of the reason is I have learned early on some of the secrets of a happy marriage: put down the toilet seat, put the cap back on the toothpaste, and answer her requests with a gentle “As you wish”. And more recently I’m learning to understand her concerns while not trying to solve them – which is always my first reaction. And it goes both ways. She has learned to accept my lack of any kind of organization – but I try! – and she still laughs at my corny jokes.

But sadly, for many, it may also be a time when you feel the loss of your true love; the time when life, unexpectedly, tossed you into a deep canyon with only memories of the special times together. Your whole world changed, and it was a struggle trying to climb out of your grief. But you eventually moved beyond the sadness and learned to adapt – and life continued. And then one day, after you have accepted the solitude, you unexpectedly found a second love, a companion, someone to create new stories and adventures with.

It may be someone you knew from church, or a friend from your school days, or someone you met at your local meal site. And although you will never forget the memories of those times with your first true love, surprisingly, you found unexpected happiness that you thought would never happen again.

Many of us will experience loss; whether the passing of a loved one or through a divorce.  But Valentine’s Day reminds us: when love is lost, it doesn’t mean it is lost forever – because it is never too late to discover a little romance one more time.

Brain Tease: The following clues each form a unique word by themselves; add them together to get the name of a country. Example: blue and yellow mixed + solid ground. Answer: green + land = Greenland

So here goes. 1. frozen water + solid ground of the earth; 2. used to refer to oneself + competed in a race; 3. anger or wrath + to lower an airplane from sky to ground; 4. a relaxing resort + not out. Bonus: never used + enthusiastic devotion + in addition.

The name of the New York’s Jet’s brash young quarterback who guaranteed a win even though they were 19 ½ points underdog was “Broadway” Joe Namath. I received correct answers from Sandy Haechrel, Judy Kiser, Ken Jernstedt, Lana Tepfer, Dave Lutgens, Donna Mollet, Bruce Johnson, James Bondurant, Rose Schulz, Keith (Wild Bill) Clymer, and Dan Crisp this week’s winner of a quilt raffle ticket. And last week I missed Raina Demmings.

In my high school English classes, I remember reading such contemporary classics as 1984, Fahrenheit 451, Lord of the Flies, and this 1945 short novel by George Orwell which was described as a satirical tale against Stalin and Russian totalitarianism.

For this week’s “Remember When” question, what was the name of this novella that tells the story of a group of animals who rebel hoping to create a society where the animals can be equal, free, and happy, but ultimately, under the dictatorship of a pig named Napoleon, ends up in a state as bad as it was before? Email your answer to mcseniorcenter@gmail.com, call 541-296-4788, or send it with the history of the Russian Revolution of 1917.

Well, it’s been another week, trying to keep the sun out of my eyes while driving.

Until we meet again, have you ever felt you were in the right place, but couldn’t remember why?

“It is a curious thought, but it is only when you see people looking ridiculous that you realize just how much you love them.” — Agatha Christie

Nutritious home-delivered and in-person meals are available at noon Monday through Friday unless otherwise noted.

Seniors of Mosier Valley (541-980-1157) – Mondays and Wednesdays; Mt. Hood Townhall (541-308-5997) – Tuesdays; Hood River Valley Adult Center (541-386-2060); Sherman County Senior and Community Center (541-565-3191); The Dalles Meals-on-Wheels (541-298-8333).

For meal sites in Washington, call Klickitat County Senior Services: Goldendale office(509-773-3757) or the White Salmon office (509-493-3068), and in Skamania County call Senior Services (509-427-3990).

Answers:  1. ice + land = Iceland; 2. I + ran = Iran; 3. ire + land = Ireland; 4. spa + in = Spain. Bonus: new + zeal + and = New Zealand

Change, not that jingle jangle left in your pants pockets or at the bottom of your purse, is one of the constant expressions of life that we depend on, but often a curse as well. But adapting to change – the pleasant surprises and the unwanted challenges – is a key to aging well. If you haven’t yet encountered any of those curve balls thrown your way, you are fortunate. But in the years ahead, it’s almost guaranteed you’ll encounter something that will test your resilience and perseverance.

But change should not be feared. In Connie Goldman’s book “The Ageless Spirit” she shares with the reader her conversations with celebrities and friends about the challenges and rewards of aging. In her conversation with Art Linkletter, TV host and author of the book “Old Age is Not for Sissies”, he addresses the need to embrace change. “I like to think that every day some experience or some new acquaintance or some new challenge is going to change my life. There’s always one hill higher with a better view, something waiting to be learned I never knew. So till my days are over my prayer is, ‘Never fill my cup, let me go on growing up.”

Change can be difficult – it can create uncertainty and magnify our fears. But change can also be a gift of new beginnings and new opportunities – if we adapt. As W.R. Inge, English author and Anglican priest, wrote “We must cut our coat according to our cloth, and adapt ourselves to changing circumstances”.

One positive change is the Hood River Valley Adult Center’s new kitchen. Can you imagine living in your house unable to use your kitchen for six months because of remodeling? But with a dedicated staff – who had to operate out of a food cart! – and the patience of all who use the meal programs, they made it through, and the new kitchen is open. They plan to show it off on February 14^th with a special lunch, so be sure to call the Center (541-386-2060) before February 9^th to sign up.

It’s been a journey. The previous kitchen was too old and small and the number of older adults needing meals skyrocketed. So, in 2020 the HRVAC capital campaign committee went to work hoping they could raise the necessary funds.

And the community came through. They were able to raise $350,000 in community donations! There are many more to thank: The Collins Foundation, The Ford Family Foundation, the Providence Foundation, MCEED, Hood River County as well as many, many more.

Now they are on to their next project: building offices upstairs for programs serving older adults to rent at low cost. The goal is for The Center to be a one-stop shop making it easier for older adults in Hood River County to access needed services in one location.

Brain Tease: Another one too hard for my simple brain.

A 3-letter word has been taken out of each of the following words. Can you figure it out?

C_ _ _H;    SP_ _ _CH;   _ _ _ION;   PI_ _ _

The legendary musician who wrote and originally recorded “I’m So Lonesome I Could Cry” (1949) as well as other country classics was Hank Williams. I received correct answers from Sam Vilycer, Nancy Higgins, Judy Kiser, Dave Lutgens, Rhonda Spies, Rose Schulz, Keith Clymer, Donna Mollet, Eva Summers, Bruce Johnson, Pat Evensen-Brady, Stephen Woolpert, Rebecca Abrams, and Doug Nelson this week’s winner of a quilt raffle ticket. And last week I missed Julie Carter.

It’s Super Bowl time with Taylor Swift’s Kansas City Chiefs playing the San Francisco 49ers on Sunday. But one of the greatest sports upsets of all time was Superbowl III when the Baltimore Colts played the New York Jets. For this week’s “Remember When” question, who was the New York’s Jet’s brash young quarterback who guaranteed a win even though they were 19 ½ points underdog? Email your answer to mcseniorcenter@gmail.com, call 541-296-4788, or send it with a picture of the 1964 Alabama Crimson Tide football team.

Well, it’s been another week, enjoying the sun when it shines. Until we meet again, keep it simple.

“You gotta try your luck at least once a day, because you could be going around lucky all day and not even know it.”  Jimmy Dean

Nutritious home-delivered and in-person meals are available at noon Monday through Friday unless otherwise noted.

Seniors of Mosier Valley (541-980-1157) – Mondays and Wednesdays; Mt. Hood Townhall (541-308-5997) – Tuesdays; Hood River Valley Adult Center (541-386-2060); Sherman County Senior and Community Center (541-565-3191); The Dalles Meals-on-Wheels (541-298-8333).

For meal sites in Washington, call Klickitat County Senior Services: Goldendale office (509-773-3757) or the White Salmon office (509-493-3068), and in Skamania County call Senior Services (509-427-3990).

Answers: LOT.

It’s that time of the year to find whether you paid Uncle Sam too much or not enough. And there are many ways to find out: the many excellent tax preparers in the Gorge, online tax software programs such as TurboTax and H&R Block, or if your Adjusted Gross Income is under $79,000, you can access free software at https://taxaide.aarpfoundation.org/ or https://www.irs.gov/filing/free-file-do-your-federal-taxes-for-free.

But if you find professional tax preparers too expensive or you don’t feel comfortable using an online tax software program, there is free help available through the Gorge Tax-Aide Foundation Program and their team of dedicated volunteer tax preparers who are trained and IRS-certified every year to make sure they understand the latest changes to the tax code.

You will have to make an appointment for one of the five sites in the Gorge.

For two sites you just call to make your appointment. At the Pioneer Center site, located in White Salmon, call 509-493-3068 for an appointment on Tuesdays from 9-12 pm. At the Tygh Valley Community Center site, call 541-395-2598 for a drop-off appointment on Thursdays from 9:00 – 12:00 starting on February 8th.

At the three sites in Hood River and The Dalles, you are asked to go to the Columbia Gorge AARP Foundation Tax-Aide website https://gorgetaxaide.simplybook.me to make an appointment.

Those sites and times are:

Hood River Valley Adult Center, 2010 Sterling Place, Thursdays from 2:00 – 5:00; Mid-Columbia Senior Center, 1112 W. 9th St, The Dalles, Fridays from 3:00 – 6:00 and Saturdays from 9:00 – 12:00; and Columbia Gorge Community College, Hood River Campus, Room 302, Mondays from 1:30 – 5:00

There is one requirement for making an appointment online: you will need to provide an email address. If don’t have one or you for some reason are unable to make an appointment online, you can visit a Tax-Aide site when the tax preparers are there, and they will assist you in making an appointment. Or you can call your local senior center to see if there is a way they can help.

You will also find on the AARP Tax-Aide website the types of returns they can and can’t do; as well as a complete list of essential documents to bring including your past tax returns from 2021/2022. And don’t forget to bring government-issued identification for both you and your spouse EVEN if both of you are not present; and a Social Security identification card (original, photocopy, or a photo on your smartphone) for all individuals listed on the tax return. And if you would like to use direct deposit, bring your bank account information.

Although we may have strong differing opinions about how much we should pay in taxes and for what, we can all agree taxes are essential in providing the important services that support older adults.

Brain Tease: Changing one letter in each of these words: Storm, Payable, Cable, Moth will make new words that are all related to each other. What are the new words?

The comedian who was a regular on the Smothers Brothers Show and ran for President in 1968 with the campaign slogan, “Just a common, ordinary, simple savior of America’s destiny” was Pat Paulson. I received correct answers from Stephen Woolpert, Bruce Johnson, Judy Kiser, Rhonda Spies, Dave Lutgens, Lana Tepfer, Jess Birge, Eva Summers, Donna Mollet, Nancy Higgins, Doug Nelson, and Bob Haechrel this week’s winner of a quilt raffle ticket.

Although I’ve enjoyed listening to country western music, I must admit I never was a big fan. But I do remember when driving cross-country stopping at a small restaurant somewhere in middle America and playing on the jukebox “I’m So Lonesome I Could Cry” recorded by BJ Thomas. For this week’s “Remember When” question, who was the legendary musician who wrote and originally recorded the song in 1949 as well as other classics including “Hey, Good Lookin’” (1951) and “Your Cheatin’ Heart” (1952)? Email your answer to mcseniorcenter@gmail.com, call 541-296-4788, or send it with a picture of the Kaiser Shipyards in Portland where he worked briefly during WWII.

Well, it’s been another week, looking for the the puzzle now that I’ve found the missing piece. Until we meet again, don’t hide yourself under a bushel.

“It takes considerable knowledge just to realize the extent of your own ignorance.” Thomas Sowell

Nutritious home-delivered and in-person meals are available at noon Monday through Friday unless otherwise noted.

Seniors of Mosier Valley (541-980-1157) – Mondays and Wednesdays; Mt. Hood Townhall (541-308-5997) – Tuesdays; Hood River Valley Adult Center (541-386-2060); Sherman County Senior and Community Center (541-565-3191); The Dalles Meals-on-Wheels (541-298-8333).

For meal sites in Washington, call Klickitat County Senior Services: Goldendale office(509-773-3757) or the White Salmon office (509-493-3068), and in Skamania County call Senior Services (509-427-3990).

Answers: Story, Parable, Fable, Myth.

When I wrote last week’s column, I thought the winter storm weather was over. Boy was I wrong! It wasn’t until Saturday morning that I could shovel out my car, and I might add without the help of my neighbor – although I certainly could have used him! 

I don’t enjoy slipping and sliding on snow-covered streets. But what I dislike just as much is driving at night. There are more dark nights than snowy days, and in the snow, I can at least see what I’m sliding into.

So, what should we know about driving at night? Tom Vanderbilt in his article “Why People Have Difficulty Driving at Night” on the AARP website offers some thoughts.

It’s not surprising that as we grow older our eyes change: vision in daylight may be just fine, but our night vision becomes less acute; our pupils shrink with age, so we become less sensitive to changes in contrast and less able to distinguish objects from their background; and most annoying, the glare from the bright lights of oncoming headlights which after seeing takes us longer for our visual acuity to return to normal.

Consequently, many of us try to avoid driving at night, but often we can’t: the night drive back from Portland, an evening meeting, or going to dinner with a friend.  

So here are a few tips. 

1. Stick to the roads you know and are more confident driving. 
2. Be cautious when approaching unfamiliar Intersections or changes in the traffic patterns.  
3. Don’t rush and allow yourself extra travel time when driving at night – although it is unsettling when semis are passing me on I-84! 
4. Keep ample space between yourself and other drivers so you have more time to react.
5. Make sure all your windows and mirrors are clean. Dirty windows tend to fog up more often at night. 
6. Make sure your headlights are aligned properly. You don’t want to throw too much light toward oncoming traffic and less on the road ahead.
7. Set the illumination levels of your dashboard lights and any in-car screens to low. Bright light inside makes it harder to see outside.
8. Use your brights at night in almost all cases when there are no oncoming cars. High beams give you the best chance of reacting fast enough to an unexpected hazard. Even on dark, rural roads without much traffic, some three-quarters of drivers typically use their low beams, causing drivers to overdrive their headlights.
9. Take a driving course such as the AARP Smart Driver online class or in-person class when available in the Gorge. 
10. See a physician regularly for eye exams to be sure your eyes are still fit for driving at night. 

The snow-covered roads will be gone soon, but we will still have long winter nights for a while. So, when you drive after dark, consider these tips to make sure you reach your destination safely.

Brain Tease. See if you can decipher this quote by Elbert Hubbard?

“evila ti fo tuo teg reven lliw uoY .ylsuoires oot efil ekat ton oD “

The name of the 1930s animated cartoon character and famous sex symbol was “Boop-Oop-a-Doop” Betty Boop – a favorite of many. I received correct answers from Sandy Haechrel, Donna Mollet, Bruce Johnson, Lana Tepfer, Judy Kiser, Tina Castanares, Rebecca Abrams, Dave Lutgens, Pat Evenson-Brady, Keith Clymer, Kathy Gay, Deborah Medina, Nancy Higgins, Linda Frizzell, Marny Weting and Stephen Woolpert this week’s winner of a quilt raffle ticket. 

This comedian was a regular on the Smothers Brothers Show and ran for President in 1968 with the campaign slogan, “Just a common, ordinary, simple savior of America’s destiny”. For this week’s “Remember When” question, what is the name of this comedian who announced during his campaign, “It is time to forget the petty bickering and settle down to an old-fashioned mudslinging campaign”? Email your answer to mcseniorcenter@gmail.com, call 541-296-4788, or send it with the 1968 movie about his run for president on the “Straight-Talking American Government” ticket.

Well, it’s been another week, staying warm under the covers. Until we meet again, keep those home fires burning.

“The art of living lies in the fine mingling of letting go and holding on.” Havelock Ellis

Nutritious home-delivered and in-person meals are available at noon Monday through Friday unless otherwise noted. Seniors of Mosier Valley (541-980-1157) – Mondays and Wednesdays; Mt. Hood Townhall (541-308-5997) – Tuesdays; Hood River Valley Adult Center (541-386-2060); Sherman County Senior and Community Center (541-565-3191); The Dalles Meals-on-Wheels (541-298-8333).

For meal sites in Washington, call Klickitat County Senior Services: Goldendale office (509-773-3757) or the White Salmon office (509-493-3068), and in Skamania County call Senior Services (509-427-3990).

Answers: “Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.”

Well, how about that for a wild Wintry Mix? I hope everyone survived – safe and warm with no broken bones, spoiled food, or frayed relationships from too much time too close together. But at least we don’t live in Minnesota where I’m told they have four seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter, and road construction!

What’s distressing is even when we get past this first winter storm with temperatures that were much too cold, there are still sixty-six days until the start of spring. I think there should be some meteorological law that states the colder the winter, the quicker spring arrives!

But I don’t think that will happen, so a few winter safety tips could still be helpful. But what don’t you already know about staying safe during the winter? I mean you have made it this far – and you’ve probably seen much worse.

I’m not sure there’s much, but maybe a few of the many tips from “Tip Sheet: Winter Safety for Older Adults” found at HealthinAging.org might help prevent injuries during the winter months.

Fires and carbon monoxide: If you use a wood or gas stove, make sure it is properly used, vented, and cleaned. You can even install carbon monoxide detectors in your house.

Space heaters: Make sure they are at least three feet away from anything that might catch fire; place the heater on the floor surface, not a table, that is hard, level, and nonflammable; and turn it off when you leave the room or go to bed.

Shoveling snow: This can put added stress on your old ticker when it is already working double time to keep warm in the cold weather. So, don’t push it – or hire someone. (Before I had a chance, a young neighbor without asking shoveled our steps which was very considerate, but offended my I-can-still-do-that! self-image.)

Slipping and falling: Every winter I hear of someone breaking a leg, arm, or hip. So be particularly careful of icy steps and pavement that appears just wet but is iced over; wear boots with non-skid soles; use a cane or ski pole when walking; and don’t forget to “walk like a penguin”.

But you knew all of that, right?

So maybe the best advice is just to stay alert and take your time. We may not be as quick or flexible, but our years of experience should make us smarter and wiser so we are safe during these winter months.

Brain Tease. Each pair of hints below relates to two words. One of the words is the other one spelled backward. What are the five word pairs? 1. married, moisture; 2. retain, sneaking look; 3. weapons, tight fit; 4. portion, catching device; 5. prize, furniture compartment.

The duplicating machine often found in schools, libraries, and churches in the 50s, 60s, and 70s was the mimeograph machine, or ditto machine (spirit duplicator), or a hectograph which apparently all coexisted at the same time. I received correct answers from Jonnie Anderson, Debra from Lyle, Bruce Johnson, Tina Castanares, Judy Kiser, Melanie Perkins, Sandy Haechrel and Rhonda Spies who neither one liked the icky smell, Donna Mollet, Rebecca Abrams, Dave Lutgens, Linda Frizzell, Lana Tepfer, Kim Birge, Elaine Kirby, Pat Evenson Brady, and Melanie Perkins who is this week’s winner of a quilt raffle ticket.

Max Fleisher brought to the movie screen such comic characters Popeye, Superman, and this caricature of a Jazz Age flapper. For this week’s “Remember When” question, what was the name of this 1930s animated cartoon character and famous sex symbol (if a cartoon character can be considered a sex symbol, but it was the 30s!)?  E-mail your answer to mcseniorcenter@gmail.com, call 541-296-4788, or drop it off with the Talkartoon “Minnie the Moocher” with Cab Calloway that’s considered one of the greatest cartoons of all time.

Well, it’s been another week, ducking and dodging – which isn’t getting any easier. Until we meet again, as Hal Borland, once said “No winter lasts forever; no spring skips its turn.”

“One can follow the sun, of course, but I have always thought that it is best to know some winter, too, so that the summer, when it arrives, is the more gratefully received.” Beatriz Williams

Nutritious home-delivered and in-person meals are available at noon Monday through Friday unless otherwise noted.

Seniors of Mosier Valley (541-980-1157) – Mondays and Wednesdays; Mt. Hood Townhall (541-308-5997) – Tuesdays; Hood River Valley Adult Center (541-386-2060); Sherman County Senior and Community Center (541-565-3191); The Dalles Meals-on-Wheels (541-298-8333).

For meal sites in Washington, call Klickitat County Senior Services: Goldendale office (509-773-3757) or the White Salmon office (509-493-3068), and in Skamania County call Senior Services (509-427-3990).

Answers: 1. wed, dew; 2. keep, peek; 3. guns, snug; 4. part, trap; 5. reward, drawer.

After my wife and I spent nine nights visiting our children in San Diego and San Luis Obispo, it was nice to come back home. Back to my regular routines where I know what to expect each day: waking up, getting dressed, eating my Cheerios for breakfast, working; then exercising, eating dinner, watching a comedy, and going to sleep. Not the most exciting, but familiar.

And not every day is the same. There are meetings, visits with friends, and doctor’s appointments, but I can control those changes in my routine – except the doctor’s appointments!  I’ve found, as you may have also, that regular routines can make life simpler and less stressful.

Now I’m not complaining. It was a wonderful visit: assembling my daughter’s new Ikea bed – which was an all-day endeavor that tested both my brawn and brain; watching The Muppets Christmas Carol on Christmas Day; and spending time walking on the beach in coat and scarf – it was a cold blustery wind! And I can’t forget the casual scenic 20 mph drives along the L.A. freeways.

We had fun hanging out with our children, although we’re still waiting for grandchildren, and are looking forward to visiting them again next December. But I’ve found after being away for nine nights, it felt good to be back home and my daily routines – although, if the temperatures drop down into the low teens, I just might have the urge to take the next flight to San Diego!

But it’s time to catch up on all of you who sent in answers for the last three “Remember When” questions.

The child actor who was Hollywood’s top box-office attraction from 1935 through 1938 was Shirley Temple. I received correct answers from Sandy Haechrel, Nancy Higgins, Judy Kiser, Rhonda Spies, Dave Lutgens, Rebecca Abrams, Bruce Johnson, Debbie Medina, Eva Summers, Donna Mollet, Linda Frizzell, Lana Tepfer, Kim Birge, Keith and Marlene Clymer, Mike Nagle, Anne Saxby, Craig Terry, and Judy Hanson.

The prolific American author and former lawyer, best known for the Perry Mason series of legal detective stories was Earle Stanley Gardner. I received correct answers from Jay Waterbury, Rebecca Abrams, Jess Birge, Judy Kiser, Rhonda Spies, Lana Tepfer, Dave Lutgens, Donna Mollet, Anne Saxby, and Pat Evenson-Brady.

And from last week, the name of the comedy trio active from 1922 until 1970 and who were known for their eye-pokes, face slaps, hollow head knocks, and knuckle cracks were the Three Stooges: Larry Fine, Moe Howard, and the third stooge played by brothers Shemp Howard and then Curly Howard. I received correct answers from Jay Waterbury, Judy Kiser, Keith and Marlene Clymer, “Nyuk, Nyuk” Jess Birge, and those who also answered the bonus question: Marny Wetting, Donna Mollet, Dave Lutgens, Lana Tepfer, Bruce Johnson, Elaine Kirby, Rebecca Abrams, Eva Summers, Rhonda Spies, and Rose Shultz.

And winners of a quilt raffle ticket for the last three weeks are Craig Terry, Anne Saxby, and Eva Summers.

I remember using this duplicating device, often found in schools, libraries, and churches, that printed multiple copies of images in light purple ink but fell victim to the Xerox copier. (I particularly remember in grade school wanting to smell the sweet chemical aroma of the damp newly produced copies.) For this week’s “Remember When” question, what was the name of this machine that was easy to use, inexpensive to purchase, and produced many pop quizzes for young school children? Email your answer to mcseniorcenter@gmail.com, call 541-296-4788, or send it with a box of two-ply spirit masters.

And quickly before the lights go dark, here is this week’s Brain Tease. Which number is next in the sequence: 11, 22, 43, 74, 115, 76, 137, ___?

Well, it has been another week trying to face the music without losing the beat. Until we meet again, enjoy the present because as a friend once reminded me, “Today is the oldest you have ever been – and the youngest you will ever be.”

“We don’t know all the answers. If we knew all the answers we’d be bored, wouldn’t we? We keep looking, searching, trying to get more knowledge.” Jack LaLanne

Nutritious home-delivered and in-person meals are available at noon Monday through Friday unless otherwise noted.

Seniors of Mosier Valley (541-980-1157) – Mondays and Wednesdays; Mt. Hood Townhall (541-308-5997) – Tuesdays; Hood River Valley Adult Center (541-386-2060); Sherman County Senior and Community Center (541-565-3191); The Dalles Meals-on-Wheels (541-298-8333).

For meal sites in Washington, call Klickitat County Senior Services: Goldendale office (509-773-3757) or the White Salmon office (509-493-3068), and in Skamania County call Senior Services (509-427-3990).

Answer:

118. The last digit in each number is simply increasing by one each time. Add all the digits of each number to get the first digit(s) of the next number.

For the past several years, in my first column, I have shared lessons I’ve learned from my own experiences navigating this thing called aging, and most importantly from talking with older adults who are much wiser than I am.

I know this journey of ours is not about living longer – even though our children may want us to live forever. It is about caring for ourselves and others, so we can gracefully live the rest of our lives with courage, compassion, and meaning.

Every year I’ll revise the list: dropping some lessons and adding a few additional ones I have gleaned from the past year. And since none of these lessons are my original thoughts, this year I’m acknowledging those teachers from whom I learned the lesson – at least the teachers I can remember.

So, here are this year’s “25 Lessons Learned”. You’ve probably heard them all before – but for me, it always helps to hear them again.

1. What is good for your heart is good for your brain.
2. Learn a new skill without worrying about how good you’ll be.
3. First steps to improve your memory: pay attention and focus.
4. Most things don’t matter, but a few really do.
5. Stay current with friends. There may not be a tomorrow. (Jerry Tanquist)
6. Getting older beats the alternative, but it is hard work.
7. Accept what you can’t control – and then adapt.
8. Live in the “now”.
9. Know what you want and let others know – particularly your adult children!
10. Tiredness causes tiredness. Do something.
11. Add color to your meals – meaning eat your vegetables!
12. Isolation kills. Stay connected.
13. Keep moving – at least 30 minutes a day.
14. “See the world with virgin eyes and you’ll find the extraordinary in the ordinary.” (Dewitt Jones)
15. Relationships are more important than things.
16. Grey hair is cool – and beautiful.
17. Living is aging. Embrace your age.
18. We all depend on each other, so there is no shame in asking for help.
19. Everybody has a story to tell – if we listen.
20. Five “S’s” to avoid: Sugar, Salt, Seconds, Soda, and Shortening. (Adeline Knorr)
21. “Dream as if you will live forever and live as if you will die tomorrow.” (James Dean)
22. Three rules to live a long and healthy life: Don’t fall, Don’t fall, Don’t fall. (Bea Dick)
23. Stay busy, but don’t rush. (Bill Noonan)
24. “Dementia does not rob someone of their dignity, it’s our reaction to them that does.” (Teepa Snow)
25. “If you sit on your porch and wave a parade might just come by.” (Gary Young)

Brain Tease: See if you can find out what the animals are! For example, “To run away or escape” could be a “flea”.

1. hair control foam. 2. very exposed. 3. a lamenting cry. 4. a dull person. 5. a precious or loved one. 6. first you get a parking ticket, then you get this. 7. these make up a chain.

The prolific American author and former lawyer, best known for the Perry Mason series of legal detective stories was Earle Stanley Gardner. Since I’m submitting this column early because of my trip to California to visit my children, next week I’ll mention all of you who sent in correct answers.

Most of you probably have memories of watching this comedy team that was active from 1922 until 1970 and starred in 190 short subject films. For this week’s “Remember When” question, what was the name of the comedy trio who were known for their eye-pokes, face slaps, hollow head knocks, and knuckle cracks? And for bonus points, what were the names of the three characters that composed the trio? Email your answer to mcseniorcenter@gmail.com, leave a message at 541-296-4788, or send it with the twenty-disc collection of their short films.

Well, it’s been another week, forgetting what year it is. Until we meet again, stay warm and enjoy the slow motion of winter nights.

“It is utterly false and cruelly arbitrary to put all the play and learning into childhood, all the work into middle age, and all the regrets into old age.” Margaret Mead

Nutritious home-delivered and in-person meals are available at noon Monday through Friday unless otherwise noted.

Seniors of Mosier Valley (541-980-1157) – Mondays and Wednesdays; Mt. Hood Townhall (541-308-5997) – Tuesdays; Hood River Valley Adult Center (541-386-2060); Sherman County Senior and Community Center (541-565-3191); The Dalles Meals-on-Wheels (541-298-8333).

For meal sites in Washington, call Klickitat County Senior Services: Goldendale office (509-773-3757) or the White Salmon office (509-493-3068), and in Skamania County call Senior Services (509-427-3990).

Answer: 1. Moose (Mousse). 2. Bear (Bare). 3. Whale (Wail). 4. Boar (Bore). 5. Deer (Dear). 6. Toad (Towed). 7. Lynx (Links).

Since we’ll be starting a new year, isn’t it time to make your New Year’s resolution? Now hold on! You may feel New Year’s resolutions are just a waste of time: you’ve lived this long, so why change now?

But think about it. There might be some new habits you want to make or some old ones you want to break. What was your doctor telling you? Join an exercise class or start walking with a friend? Or eat better by reducing your salt and fat intake? Things you never worried about but now realize how important they are.

If you decide New Year’s resolutions might not be such a bad idea, here are nine tips to help from the book Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin.

1. Write your resolution down and be specific. Instead of “make new friends” describe how – such as “start a movie group” or “join an exercise class”.
2. Review your resolution constantly so you won’t forget.
3. Hold yourself accountable. Don’t make excuses.
4. Think big. Make your resolution inspiring and exciting.
5. Or think small. Something simple and doable.
6. Separate your resolution, no matter how small, into manageable tasks.
7. Work on your resolution every day. It is easier to do something consistently than to skip days.
8. Don’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good. The best exercise is the one you will do.
9. As mentioned before, don’t make excuses, BUT if you keep breaking your resolution, no use constantly beating yourself up. Try a different approach that will get you to the same goal.

These suggestions can help you set and achieve your goal for the new year. Because as Carl Bard said, “Although no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending”.

If you must go outside when there’s ice and snow on the ground, don’t forget to “walk like a penguin”: pointing your feet out slightly; bending your knees and keeping them loose; extending your arms out to your side and hands out of your pockets; and taking short steps or waddling. Wear shoes or boots with traction. And try some defensive walking: assume all wet and dark areas on the pavement are icy – especially around snowbanks where the melt–off freezes overnight.

Whether it’s icy or not, this is a good time to remember falls are the leading cause of fatal and nonfatal injuries among older adults. So, don’t rush, stay focused, and “walk like a penguin”!

Brain Tease: See if you can read this New Year’s quote.

.rettiuq a sekil ydobon taht derebmemer I ,nehT .raeY weN eht ni stibah dab ym fo lla pots ot gniog saw I

The child actor who was Hollywood’s top box-office attraction from 1935 through 1938 was Shirley Temple.

When you read this, I’ll be lying on the beach in my Speedo swimsuit covered with baby oil getting that perfect tan to impress the girls when I get back home! Wait a minute! Sorry, I was reliving a memory from too many years ago. Let me start again. When you read this, I’ll be sitting at a picnic table with my wife with any bare skin covered with SPF 160 sunscreen; watching all the bronzed young surfers in water that’s much too cold. So when I get back, I’ll mention all of you who sent in the correct answers for this week and next.

This prolific American author and former lawyer was best known for the Perry Mason series of legal detective stories. For this week’s “Remember When” question, what was the name of this author who at the time of his death was the best-selling American writer of the 20th century? Email your answer to mcseniorcenter@gmail.com, leave a message at 541-296-4788, or send it with his first Perry Mason novel, The Case of the Velvet Claws, published in 1933.

Well, it’s been another week, waiting to turn the page. Until we meet again, may the new year be all that you hope for.

“Lighten up, just enjoy life, smile more, laugh more, and don’t get so worked up about things.” Kenneth Branagh

Nutritious home-delivered and in-person meals are available at noon Monday through Friday unless otherwise noted.

Seniors of Mosier Valley (541-980-1157) – Mondays and Wednesdays; Mt. Hood Townhall (541-308-5997) – Tuesdays; Hood River Valley Adult Center (541-386-2060); Sherman County Senior and Community Center (541-565-3191); The Dalles Meals-on-Wheels (541-298-8333).

For meal sites in Washington, call Klickitat County Senior Services: Goldendale office (509-773-3757) or the White Salmon office (509-493-3068), and in Skamania County call Senior Services (509-427-3990).

Answer: “I was going to stop all of my bad habits in the New Year. Then, I remembered that nobody likes a quitter.”

Tis the Christmas Season: a time for memories that stir our senses: cookies baking in the oven, houses sparkling with Christmas lights, and bells ringing at local grocery stores. It’s also a time to remember how we have been blessed in our chronologically advantaged age.

But sometimes it is hard, particularly at this time of the year when we would give anything to share memories of Christmas pasts with friends and loved ones who are no longer with us. It’s not always easy to stay upbeat and positive, but Shawn Achor, who researches and teaches positive psychology, describes three steps that can help us recognize the positive instead of mindlessly absorbing the negative.

First, for twenty-one days in a row, take two minutes a day and write down three things you are grateful for.

Second, start a journal and each day write about one positive experience you encountered.

Third, do one positive random act of kindness each day – whether it’s complimenting the salesperson during a hectic Christmas shopping day or buying a bottle of Martinelli’s sparkling juice for your local senior center director.

But I would also suggest two more steps.

Fourth, each day give at least one person a big hug – the human touch is an essential nutritional requirement for the spirit.

And last, if there has been something you have been meaning to tell someone, tell them. Don’t wait and regret missing the opportunity.

Whether your glasses are rose-colored, broken, or you can’t find them, during this season of hope, love, and possibilities, consider these five steps to better appreciate all that is good and right – and the bountiful banquet spread before us.

This is a late reminder for those of you who live in Oregon. Before the end of this tax year, you have an opportunity to donate to a qualifying nonprofit and the Oregon Cultural Trust to receive a matching Oregon tax credit. All you do is donate to any of Oregon’s arts, heritage, and humanities nonprofits which includes forty in Hood River, Sherman, and Wasco counties (listed at www.culturaltrust.org). Then make a matching gift to the Cultural Trust to claim your contribution to the Cultural Trust as a tax credit – which means your Cultural Trust donation won’t cost you a thing! The Oregon Cultural Trust supports local communities by funding county Cultural Trust Coalitions that annually distribute grants to area schools and non-profits.

Brain Tease: This one turned my brain into a plate of spaghetti noodles. See how you do. “An old man said to a young man, ‘I have a daughter. She has as many brothers as she has sisters. Each one of her brothers has twice as many sisters as he has brothers. How many sons and daughters do I have?’”

If you couldn’t answer that one, here is one I found much easier. “What occurs once in June, once in July, and twice in August?”

The name of the TV Western that ran from 1965 through 1969 and followed Secret Service agents James West and Artemus Gordon was the Wild Wild West. I received correct answers from Judy Kiser, Liz Nichols, Jess Birge, Dave Lutgens, Paul Nagy, Eva Summers, Rose Schulz, Rhonda Spies, Bruce Johnson, Julie Carter, Nancy Higgins, Mike Nagle, Keith Clymer, and Donna Mollet this week’s winner of a quilt raffle ticket. And last week I missed Anne Saxby.

You may not have been alive when she was at the top of her popularity, but most of us have seen reruns of her movies when we were children. For this week’s “Remember When” question, what actor was Hollywood’s top box-office attraction from 1935 through 1938 during which time she starred in such hits as The Little Colonel – the first of several musicals featuring dancer Bill Robinson, Curly Top, and Heidi; and was so overwhelmingly popular, a nonalcoholic beverage was named after her? Email your answer to mcseniorcenter@gmail.com, leave a message at 541-296-4788, or send it with a recording of “On the Good Ship Lollipop”.

Well, it has been another week discovering what you think doesn’t matter often does. Until we meet again, don’t let your angels pass by without saying thank you.

“Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful.” Norman Vincent Peale

Nutritious home-delivered and in-person meals are available at noon Monday through Friday unless otherwise noted.

Seniors of Mosier Valley (541-980-1157) – Mondays and Wednesdays; Mt. Hood Townhall (541-308-5997) – Tuesdays; Hood River Valley Adult Center (541-386-2060); Sherman County Senior and Community Center (541-565-3191); The Dalles Meals-on-Wheels (541-298-8333).

For meal sites in Washington, call Klickitat County Senior Services: Goldendale office (509-773-3757) or the White Salmon office (509-493-3068), and in Skamania County call Senior Services (509-427-3990).

Answers: 3 sons and 4 daughters; the letter ‘u’.