Aging in the Gorge Aparil 27th 2022

 Last January I shared ideas about how to downsize including the different categories of items you might want to get rid of: the “just in case”, “maybe-someday”, “might-be-valuable” and “maybe-my-children-will-want” items.

While deciding what to clear out is difficult enough, I have found another challenge. Can you and your spouse agree? What is obvious to me to eliminate has sentimental value for her and the opposite is true. So, we have kicked the can down the hall and created another category “haven’t decided yet” which has allowed us to maintain our 47 years of marriage – at least so far.

My wife and I are making progress “decluttering” if you don’t count 80 banker boxes of stuff stored in the basement. The plan is to move into our small basement apartment which we’ve been painting, scraping, and installing countertops and sinks – and asking ourselves, “Why are we so tired?”

But all the remodeling has given me less time to write this column. so as I’ve done before when time is short or the well is dry, I looked for something I wrote in the past to revise.

So, here is an amusing test of your critical thinking skills I found on the Internet back in 2018 which you probably don’t remember, at least I don’t because I couldn’t answer a single question correctly – again!

There are only four questions with explanations, but you’ll have to put your logical thinking skills on the back burner and think outside the proverbial box.

1. The Giraffe Test – How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? Stop and think about it and decide on your answer before you move on.

The correct answer: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way.

2. The Elephant Test – How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?

Did you say, Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant, and close the refrigerator? Wrong Answer.

Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant, and close the door. This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your previous actions.

3. The Lion King Test – The Lion King is hosting an Animal Conference. All the animals attend … except one. Which animal does not attend?

Correct Answer: The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. This tests your memory.

Okay, this is your last chance before you have to pick up the phone to schedule your appointment. Think!

4. The Crocodile Test – There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat. How do you manage it?

Correct Answer: You jump into the river and swim across. Haven’t you been lis-ten-ing? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Conference. This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes.

So how did you do? Are you still mentally on top of your game? If you couldn’t answer any of the questions correctly, don’t worry. According to Anderson Consulting Worldwide, around 90% of the professionals tested got all the questions wrong. But don’t feel too relieved. They also tested preschoolers and found most children answered at least one question correctly!

The name of the comedian who performed on stage and in several movies with his brothers, Chico, Harpo, Gummo, Zeppo, and hosted the comedy quiz series You Bet Your Life was Groucho Marx. I received correct answers from Steven Woolpert, Rhonda Spies, Dave Lutgens, Kim Birge, Margo Dameier, Keith and Marlene Clymer, and Donna Mollett this week’s winner of a quilt raffle ticket. Did I miss anyone from last week?

Did you ever have the dream of finding adventure traveling across the back roads of America in a 1961 corvette convertible? For this week’s “Remember When “question, that was the basic plot of what television series starring Martin Milner and George Maharis that aired from 1960 through 1964 on Friday nights? Email your answer to, leave a message at 541-296-4788, or mail it with a map of the Will Rogers Memorial Highway.

Well, it’s been another week pretending to know what I don’t. Until we meet again, as the Beatles once sang, “Let it be”, or as the philosopher farmer from Fossil would say, “Don’t interfere with something that ain’t bothering you none.”

“I intend to live forever or die trying.” Groucho Marx


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