Whether you call it talking, conversing, dialoguing, or schmoozing, expressing yourself clearly so you are understood can be a challenge. As George Bernard Shaw once said, “The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.”

But effective communication is essential for family, caregivers, and spouses to avoid conflicts and help improve and maintain healthy relationships as we age. The following are some helpful tips – condensed for this column – from Working Caregiver. You can find more details on their website workingcaregiver.com.

1. Breathe. Start with a deep breath to relax and give yourself time to pull your thoughts together.
2. Ask questions. Find out what is really going on. Don’t take anything for granted – you know what happens when you assume.
3. Truly listen. Hear and understand their experiences and opinions and listen for any fears driving their responses that they may not even realize. And don’t argue.
4. Slow down. Take your time and think before you respond. Silence can be golden.
5. Speak directly to the person. Set aside time to have one-on-one conversations. And avoid multitasking.
6. Speak distinctly and clearly. Many of us don’t like to admit we have trouble understanding conversations.
7. Laugh. When appropriate, humor can help ease tense situations.

Last week talked about what not to carry in your wallet to avoid scams and fraud. But what impacts most of us are the billions of illegal robocalls that occur annually costing victims an average of $1,200.

But there are several ways you can reduce these irritating intrusions.

1. Add a call blocker. Check with your landline or cell phone service provider to see what no-cost or low-cost options they provide.
2. Let calls go to voicemail if you don’t know the number. I add everyone I know to my phone’s contact list, so I only answer the calls I recognize.
3. Hang up if it is a live person calling and you don’t know who they are. If you engage with the scammer, they may put more extra pressure on you to get money or your personal information.

You can report scam phone calls to the FTC by calling 1-877-382-4357 or by going online at https://reportfraud.ftc.gov/.

You can also report any scams to the AARP Fraud Watch Network at aarp.org/fraudwatchnetwork. There you can also find a map of all the scam calls reported to AARP. For example, in the Hood River Upper Valley an individual reported a scam from someone saying they were employed by Netgear and wanted to update their router. Another individual received a robocall call telling them they were behind in their payments and that their power would be turned off in thirty minutes!

Any of those sound familiar?

Even though we think it can’t happen to us, it can. Over 59 million US residents lost money from a phone scam in 2021. Don’t be fooled.

Brain Tease. Another Caesar Shift puzzle. See if you can decode this gardening quote by Bill Watterson of Calvin and Hobbes fame.

“F’j klq arjy. F grpq exsb x zljjxka lc qelolrdeiv rpbibpp fkclojxqflk.”

The 1956 thirty-four-minute short French film popular with children and educators which follows the adventures of a young boy who makes friends with an object that seems to have a mind of its own was The Red Balloon or in French Le Ballon Rouge. It’s another holiday, so next week I will mention all those who sent in correct answers.

In 1968 this Broadway musical was the talk of the theater department at Purdue University where my girlfriend at the time was a theater major. It was a groundbreaking new Broadway musical genre depicting hippies and the counterculture scene. For this week’s “Remember When” question, what was the name of this theater production described as “The American Tribal Love-Rock Musical”? Email your answer to mcseniorcenter@gmail.com, call 541-296-4788, or send it with the soundtrack that included the hits “Aquarius” and “Good Morning Starshine”.

Well, it’s been another week, tangled up in all my loose ends. Until we meet again, as Anonymous once said, “As you slide down the banisters of life, may the splinters never point the wrong way”. Ouch!

“I got called pretty today. We’ll actually the full statement was ‘you’re pretty annoying’, but I only focus on positive things.” Unknown

Nutritious home-delivered and in-person meals are available at noon Monday through Friday unless otherwise noted.

Seniors of Mosier Valley (541-980-1157) – Mondays and Wednesdays; Hood River Valley Adult Center (541-386-2060); Sherman County Senior and Community Center (541-565-3191); The Dalles Meals-on-Wheels (541-298-8333)

For meal sites in Washington, call Klickitat County Senior Services – Goldendale office (509-773-3757) or the White Salmon office (509-493-3068); Skamania County Senior Services (509-427-3990).

Answer: “I’m not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.”